my cancer

Just a Walnut Boat


And I thought things were going so well. I’m teaching and making it all the way through my lectures, and I’ve even endured a few faculty meetings. It’s been exciting to discover that I remember so much more than I was afraid I would and I love being around students again. Sure, I easily overtaxed myself, but I was getting the hang of it.

I felt like a little boat, just a walnut, a toothpick, and some paper, bobbing along. I was jostled by the waves pretty often and got really tired, but even with that I was recovering faster.

But lately my little boat has been really shaky. Or more accurately, I’ve been really shaky and queasy. Then Saturday morning we went for breakfast before running some errands, and I started “shorting out” in little blank seizures. Bits of time started blanking out and I couldn’t find a word I wanted to say. I seemed to improve after eating, but when we stopped at Target it started happening again. We went home and called the neurologist who doubled my medication. Nothing exciting happened after that, but when I called my new neurologist, my old neurologist, and my rad onco and no onehad any time to see me until by rad onco maybe on Friday.

I was heartened when both my medical and radiation oncologists didn’t think they needed to see me until late March, but now I feel like we’ve been left a bit at sea.

I’ve also caught a cold.


10 thoughts on “Just a Walnut Boat

  1. dear acacia,

    walnut boat…a bit at sea…so sorry for you having to wait to see your doctor. i will keep you close to my heart and hope the new doseage of your meds calms things down. and oh, a cold on top of everything – that’s just plain crappy.

    love and gentle hugs to you,

    karen, TC

    • So far the doubling of the anti-siezure meds has gotten everything back under control, and dayquil makes the cold a little easier. And the fact that it was 5 degrees outside made staying at home today kind of okay.

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